books to read if you're a dude who wants to be more pro-feminist

The Story of Jane: The Legendary Underground Feminist Abortion Service by Laura Kaplan
Jane was, as the title says, an underground feminist abortion service in the days before abortion was legalized. The women in the group started as a referral service to various abortionists, then realized they needed a more reliable option for the women who were depending on them. They found a man who claimed to be a doctor who was willing to set up regular appointments for women in need of abortions, which he provided reliably and safely. When women from the collective began to chafe at the notion of depending on this slightly sketchy guy and subsequently discovered he was not a real doctor, a couple of them began to learn to perform abortions themselves, until they were eventually able to perform all the procedures within the collective, creating a more positive environment for the women who came to them and helping preserve the secrecy of what they were doing. The notion of learning to provide abortions without formal medical training or a clinic setting seems nothing short of terrifying to me, but I guess that's a function of living in an era and location where I have the luxury to choose to go to a free clinic if I get pregnant. Realistically speaking, I guess it's even scarier to condemn yourself or your friend, sister, or mother to the danger of a poorly performed back alley abortion (or self abortion) or to raising a child that isn't wanted. At any rate, some hella gutsy women and a really good story.

Promiscuities by Naomi Wolf
Naomi Wolf can be a bit overly liberal feminist for my tastes, but she's definitely a smart lady and an excellent writer, and I've really enjoyed reading and re-reading this book. She uses historical information from various time periods and anecdotes/personal experience from what she and her friends went through going through their teenage years in San Francisco in the 1960s, and it makes for a compelling combination. This is the only book I've ever read that gives a truly accurate description about what it's like to be a teenage girl, and for that, it's something I think should be read by guys as well. It's interesting (if sad) to see how much of the peer pressure, insecurities, and problems with abusive and predatory men are universal experiences of all girls, no matter where or when they grew up. Really interesting and good stuff.

No Fat Chicks: How Women Are Brainwashed to hate Their Bodies and Spend Their Money by Terry Poulton
Written by a magazine journalist, so not the best writing, but completely heartfelt, sincere, and well backed up with statistics. Poulton did a six month series for Chatelaine that was meant to chronicle her inspirational story of weight loss. Instead of losing the weight healthily, she found herself yo-yo dieting, binging then starving herself, and exercising compulsively, just to be able to put her story together. This experience, as well as her experiences living as a woman who is bigger than our society considers acceptable prompted her to research the diet industry, and discover some horrific practices. It's grotesque and terrifying to read about women literally dying on the steps of diet clinics because the "medical advice" they received therein was so inattentive and ignorant of the amount of food they actually need to survive. Poulton reveals that (big surprise) the diet industry and medical profession (as well as most people) don't seem to value women's health, only our attractiveness as filtered through beauty standards. Buy this book for your mom and little sister, and make all your friends read it, too.

Stone Butch Blues by Leslie Feinberg
One of the saddest books I've ever read, and one of the best. A thinly fictionalized account of Feinberg's upbringing as a blue collar dyke in an era where butch and femme roles were firmly entrenched in lesbian culture. Feinberg braves abuse from their family, kids at school, random guys on the street, and repeated rapes and beatings from the cops. In addition, when second wave feminism starts to become popular, they have to deal with other more new school lesbians telling them that butch/femme relationships are wrong and nothing but a misogynistic re-creation of patriarchal gender roles, with no acknowledgement given to history and traditions of queer culture.

Refusing to be a Man: Essays on Sex and Justice by John Stoltenberg
This book explores the ways in which male sexual identity is formed and expressed, and I found it really interesting to read. As someone who only sees and experiences men's behaviour from the outside (aka a lady), it was neat to read a guy's perspective on what it is to be masculine in our society, and to hear a man's pro-feminist ideas on positive ways to express and deal with being male. Although Stoltenberg makes a lot of positive, valid points, I should mention that he's completely anti-porn, which I disagree with. There's something really irritating about reading a man's self-righteous condemnation of women's right to work in the sex trade or enjoy porn/erotica. In one chapter he reprints passages from mainstream porn that he feels depict rape. All are clumsily written, and most are offensive and borderline abusive, but some are clearly consensual depictions of rough sex. It really bothers me when men take it upon themselves to dictate what kinds of sex women are allowed to enjoy under the guise of protecting us. We don't need to be protected from our own genuine desires, dammit. Still, all objections aside, this is definitely a worthwhile read.